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Fire Brigade Tells People Not To Put Their Private Parts In Toasters

Monday 29th July 2013

London Fire Brigade has published the number of unusual incidents they have dealt with - with private parts in odd places ranking highly - and say numbers are rising.

Since 2010 LFB has attended more than 1,300 incidents of people being trapped or stuck, often in household items.

In 2010/11 crews attended 416 incidents; in 2011/12 this rose to 441 incidents and in 2012/13 it shot up to 453.

Among the call outs were 18 incidents involving children with their heads stuck in potties or toilet seats, 79 incidents of people being stuck in handcuffs and nine incidents of men with rings stuck on their penises.

The Brigade said that in the past its crews have been called to a man whose penis was stuck in a toaster, and another with his manhood trapped in a vacuum cleaner. 

Each call out costs taxpayers at least 290 - which adds up to 377,000 over the three year period.

Fire Chiefs want people to think more carefully before dialling 999, although say they should always ring it in the case of a real emergency.

Third Officer, Dave Brown, said a recently popular book may have had an impact on the rising rates.

"Some of the incidents our firefighters are called out could be prevented with a little common sense. I don't know whether it's the Fifty Shades effect, but the number of incidents involving items like handcuffs seems to have gone up. I'm sure most people will be Fifty Shades of Red by the time our crews arrive to free them.

"I'd like to remind everyone that 999 is an emergency number and should only be used as such. When firefighters are out attending to some of these avoidable incidents, someone else could be in real need of emergency assistance.

"If there's a genuine emergency, fire crews will of course attend and will be on the scene to help within minutes."

LFB is called to more than one incident of people getting stuck in things a day - with rings the most common type.

"Our advice is simple," said a Brigade spokesperson, "If the ring doesn't fit, don't force it on. As well as being painful, you could end up wasting emergency service time if you have to call us out."

Their three top tips to avoid getting into tricky situations:

- Common sense is needed - if it doesn't look safe, it probably isn't, so dont do it!

- If you use handcuffs, always keep the keys handy

- Fingers and electrical appliances don't mix, especially those with blades