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Saturday 25th October 2014
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Give Her The Perfect Oral Sex

Question: What do many women love more than shopping, chocolate and straight intercourse?
Answer: Getting good oral sex

It’s true! In a survey I conducted a few years ago, asking 200 women about their sex lives, most of them put top of their favourites the art of cunnilingus – that’s ‘oral’ to those of you who don’t speak. It’s not that we don’t love penetration. It’s that – like you guys - we particularly love being able to lie back and not have to perform. For our man to pay us all the attention, bringing us to climax after climax, is our idea of heaven.

So how to achieve that? There are no rules, no sure fire ways - the whole point is that every woman has her own way of reaching the peak. But here are some guidelines to help every man deliver the oral sex of her dreams.

1: Work from the outside in
It’s not enough to simply head straight between her legs; in order to feel full oral pleasure, she’ll typically need to prepare with lots of foreplay.  So move in from her hands, up from her feet, gently and sensitively focussing between her legs.  Long smooth strokes up the inside of her thighs, and down her centre line, Yes use fingers – but remind her of what’s coming by using your mouth too, kissing, licking and sucking.

2: Pleasure her lips
Her labia – outer and inner – are almost as sensitive as her clitoris, so pay them lots of attention. Again, long, smooth strokes of your tongue, up one side, back down the other. Hold her lips open – stretched skin can be more sensitive- then close her lips together but let your tongue brush inside.

3: Adore her clitoris
Remember that her clit is the equivalent of his penis – that’s where most of the sensation lies. But unlike his bigger organ, she’ll need much gentler treatment. So lick softly, from root to tip. Flick across from side to side. As with him the aim is to bring her erect – when you feel her hardening, you can increase the pressure and speed.

4: Penetrate with care
Yes, some women love to feel a tongue in her vagina; but for most it’s not the real point. He may think it’ll feel like as good as being penetrated with his penis - but for her it’s a side dish to the main course of attention on her clit. So yes, circle the entrance to her vagina with your tongue, yes slide in and out occasionally – but don’t major on that action. Instead, if she wants penetration, use gentle slow fingers in her vagina to mirror what your tongue is doing to her clit. (PS: never ever blow into her vagina; it’s dangerous!)

5: Focus in on her tip
The tip of her clitoris is just like the tip of his penis – it’s protected by a small flap of skin that, when she’s erect, slides back to reveal an incredibly sensitive glands. Lick this before she’s aroused and it’ll hurt; wait until she’s fully ready and it’ll deliver a deep, piercing pleasure. Again, go gently but otherwise it’s fine to use the same kind of movement that pleases him; across and back, round and round, tracing circles with your tongue. Switch back and forth from this to licking the shaft of her clit and the combined sensation will make her crazy.

6: If it feels good, keep doing it
If by her reaction you know you’re hitting the spot, then keep going – whatever movement, pressure or rhythm you’re using obviously works! But equally, if you’re not getting a good reaction, try experimenting. Change your tongue action, go harder or (more likely) softer, switch the rhythm. As said at the start, she’ll have her own magic combinations; a good lover will find out what they are – and then remember them for next time!

7: Bring her over the edge
When he climaxes, he usually needs it hard and fast; such tough treatment can actively hurt her. So it could be she needs the exact opposite; check with her, but be prepared to pull back slightly, go more slowly, ease off the pressure or simply press your tongue on her clit and hold it there as she comes. Afterwards, go carefully – she’ll be exquisitely sensitive, so give just a final gentle kiss or lick before you withdraw…