Stay tuned...

7 October 2017, 20:57 | Updated: 7 October 2017, 21:01

Donald Trump might as well have been teasing across an advertising break on the US version of The Apprentice: “Come back after this to find out who we'll be at war with next.”

The president surrounded himself with military staff, called in the press and said on Thursday night that it was the "calm before the storm".

“What storm?” was the question from the press, and Trump said “You'll see”.

Isn't it exciting? Who will we be joining America to bomb next? Will it be North Korea, China, Iran, Puerto Rico, CNN?

Outside of his fans with the Tiki torches and straight arm salutes, he is about as popular at home as doggy-doo on the carpet and as ratings seem to be the most important thing to him outside of money, he is likely do the only thing he can think of to boost his numbers, which is start a war.

A real war, not the phoney, well thought out war with black American footballers, or the one with women who want birth control.

They were just pre-planned distractions aimed at keeping the press off guard and his fans sending in the money (his supposedly off-the-cuff remarks about NFL owners firing those players that take a knee during the National Anthem were followed by adverts made by wealthy donors asking those that agree to turn off the game).

No, this will be the real thing and the unlucky recipient of his plan to get re-elected might be Iran.

Trump is supposed to be giving one of his apocalyptic speeches in a few days’ time and he's already rated his performance as A+.

It will be the greatest speech by an American president or anybody else, I can tell you that, everybody says so, even though it hasn't happened yet.

On October 12, it is expected that he will blame Iran for fuelling terrorism and causing instability throughout the Middle East.

But you know what he's like, he could see something sad on TV and declare war on Disneyland for allowing Bambi's mother to get shot.

He is warming us up for war, saying that Iran had not lived up to the spirit of the nuclear deal.

This is interesting because just a few months ago, that very same Donald Trump was forced to admit that Iran WAS living up to the spirit of the nuclear deal which, by the way, was brokered by six countries, one of which was us.

The deal was that Iran should get rid of most of its nuclear fuel and infrastructure and submit to intensive monitoring to ensure it doesn't cheat.

The United Nations nuclear watchdog, the International Atomic Energy Agency, has repeatedly said Iran is complying with the accord. The U.S. Energy Department has said the same but that doesn't give Donny a chance to strut about on stage with a military backdrop and play John Wayne for the day.

The excuse Trump gave for increasing sanctions was that Iran is accused of human rights abuses and they support militant groups.

If that is the criteria for sanctions and sabre rattling, then Saudi Arabia had better batten down the hatches, just as soon as they run out of oil.

It was not Iran that the terrorists of 9/11 came from, it was Saudi Arabia. It was not Iran that Osama Bin Laden came from, it was Saudi Arabia.

Iran is not bombing children in Yemen, it's Saudi Arabia but they live on a lake of oil and they have a pile of money you could see from space, so they get a pass.

It couldn't be that the deal was brokered by Obak Arama, could it?

Trump seems desperate to rescind everything that Obama ever did.

I'm not saying he has a problem with black people but he really seems to have a problem with black people.

Maybe it is just that the Iran deal was not made by Trump himself, and every deal he did not make is the worst deal ever, a hugely bad deal, nobody ever saw such a bad deal.

The White House press secretary, said: "The president is going to make an announcement about the decision that he's made on a comprehensive strategy that his team supports, and we'll do that in the coming days."

Would that include the part of his team that thinks he is a “moron”?

Is anyone else just ever so slightly alarmed that a bright orange narcissistic buffoon off the telly with an ego as fragile as a Fabergé egg and a brain as small as a lark's is the one who is going to make decisions that could take us all to war, or is it just me?