Parents of Brit killed in Ukraine say Foreign Office ‘not helpful’ as they demand more support for families of fallen soldiers
The parents of a young British man killed while fighting in Ukraine have criticised the Foreign Office, saying it was "not helpful" to them, and warned that the families of fallen soldiers are not receiving the support they need.
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Michaela and Christopher Tarmey said their son, Marlyn, had a "strong sense of justice and compassion" and "felt deeply that he had to do something" to support Ukraine.
Marlyn joined the International Legion in March 2024 at the age of 19. His parents remained in contact with him until the day before his death, just three months later. He was killed aged 20 in June in the village of Staromaiorske, Donetsk.
Describing their loss as "devastating", the Tarmeys said they remain "immensely proud of his courage and the person he was". His remains have not yet been recovered, something they say "adds another layer of pain to our grief".
They stressed that Marlyn was "so much more than a soldier or a statistic", describing him instead as "a much loved son, grandson, cousin, brother and friend with a big heart and a great wit".
The couple said that while the Foreign Office was not supportive, they had found vital help through the RT Weatherman Foundation, which offers legal support, liaises with the Ukrainian military and spares families from having to make dangerous trips into conflict zones.
They admitted they had only discovered the foundation "by chance" after searching social media. "In our desperation, we searched social media and reached out to people who seemed to be in Ukraine," they said. "Through this, someone told us about the foundation. Without that, we would never have known they existed and we imagine many families might never hear about them at all."
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The parents added that without the organisation they would have been "completely on our own".
A Foreign Office spokesperson responded: "Where consular cases arise in conflict zones, the Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Office (FCDO) will always seek to give the maximum assistance that we are able to in the circumstances while also working with partner organisations like the R.T. Weatherman foundation who are able to give families specialist support over and above what the FCDO is able to provide."
In a statement, Michaela and Christopher Tarmey remembered their son as "full of life, funny, kind-hearted and loved by many".
They said: "He had an amazing sense of humour but also a strong sense of justice and compassion. He often said to us that Russia would not stop with Ukraine and he felt deeply that he had to do something. That's why he went to volunteer, because he wanted to stand up for what he believed in, fight against the injustice and help people who were suffering.
"We stayed in close contact while he was there, right up until the day before he was killed. He shared with us what was happening around him and we know how determined he was to stay true to his choice.
"For us as a family, the loss has been devastating, but we remain immensely proud of his courage and the person he was.
"His remains, like those of many other fallen soldiers, have yet to be recovered, which adds another layer of pain to our grief.
"Marlyn was not alone. Many other volunteers from all over the world have risked or given their lives, and they too should not be forgotten. Each one had a family, a story, and a reason. They all deserve to be remembered with dignity.
"At the same time, families of fallen soldiers need far more support. The Foreign Office has not been helpful, but the RT Weatherman Foundation has been a lifeline.
"They take on the hard work of gathering evidence, supporting families legally, communicating with the Ukrainian army, and protecting families from having to make dangerous journeys into a war zone. Without them, we would have been completely on our own.
"If we could share one message, it's this: Marlyn was so much more than a soldier or a statistic. He was a much loved son, grandson, cousin, brother and friend with a big heart and a great wit. We want his memory and the memory of other volunteers like him to be treated with humanity and respect."