Faith over fear: Why I am staying in the Church of England despite its retreat on LGBT+ equality

It is hard to describe the emotional toll of moments like this. For many of us, the Church is not an abstract institution. It is where we were baptised, where we were confirmed, where we found community and family, where we learned about grace, forgiveness, and love. To see progress paused-indefinitely-feels not simply procedural, but deeply personal.

I am saddened though not surprised by recent reports that suggest LGBT+ people are leaving the church in significant numbers.

Why would you stay someplace where you’re not apparently wanted? Where you are told, explicitly or implicitly, that your relationships, are second-best, your identity somehow invalid, your lived experience not worthy of respect or a decent hearing, there comes a point where walking away can feel like an act of self-preservation.

I fully respect those who make that choice. No one should be asked to remain in a place that wounds them.

But I have chosen to stay.

To continue to attend my local CofE church, which is part of the Inclusive Church network, that has embraced me and fellow LGBT+ Christians as a vital part of our church family and, whilst certainly not perfect and having to live within the wider church’s rules preventing things like same-sex weddings, is as celebratory as it can be of its lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, or in any other way queer brethren.

I'm in my church's worship group, read lessons, lead prayers, and write for its magazine.

I stay because my faith is deeper than any Synod vote. I stay because my Bible tells me that I am “fearfully and wonderfully made.” That is not a conditional promise. It does not come with a footnote excluding LGBT+ people. It is a declaration of inherent worth.

And the same scriptures command me to “love my neighbour as myself.”

My neighbour includes all who fit under the wonderful rainbow Pride banner. Loving our neighbour cannot mean relegating them to the margins of the very Church that proclaims God’s love for all.

Jesus consistently stood with the least, the last, and the lost. He stood with the persecuted and the forgotten. He challenged religious authorities when they burdened people rather than liberated them. I believe with all my heart and soul that Jesus, my living hope, stands with LGBT+ people today. In our pews, in our communities, and in our ongoing fight for full equality within the Church and beyond it.

That is why I call on the new-and first female-Archbishop of Canterbury, Sarah Mullally, to lead a new and sustained effort on behalf of LGBT+ Anglicans.

Her own appointment is proof that change is possible. There was a time when women were told they could not lead the Church. That argument was wrong then, and history has now shown it be so. Equality, once resisted, is now rightly celebrated.

The Church of England can change. It has done so before. It must now do so again.

I will stay. I will pray. And I will, with many others, keep working for a Church that truly reflects the boundless love of the God it proclaims.

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Mathew Hulbert is an LGBT+ Rights Activist, attends a CofE church in Hinckley, Leicestershire, and is a member of Deanery Synod.

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