Older people still have sex - why is that so hard to admit?
The stigma around later-life intimacy is harming people's mental and physical health, writes Dr Lis Boulton
For too long, we’ve tiptoed around the idea that sex, intimacy and desire somehow fade with age.
Listen to this article
But new insights from Age UK’s Still Got It initiative make one thing very clear: older people are still enjoying, and valuing, intimate relationships, even as society seems determined to ignore them.
Nearly three in five over 50s say a healthy sex life remains important to their relationships, yet almost half feel advertisers and brands overlook their needs. And it isn’t just the commercial world that’s failing them. One in five over 50s believe their sexual health needs are dismissed by healthcare professionals, while 39 per cent feel uncomfortable discussing their sex lives at all. That silence has consequences: sexually transmitted infections are rising in this age group, fuelled in part by the misconception that condoms are no longer necessary when pregnancy isn’t a risk.
But the issue isn’t just about physical health. The Sex, Relationships and Intimacy guide, created by Age UK alongside older people themselves, shows how stigma erodes confidence, prevents honest conversations and leaves many feeling unseen. Whether it’s navigating menopause, erectile dysfunction, bereavement, coming out later in life, or the emotional minefield of dating in the age of apps, older people deserve practical, inclusive information – and the dignity of being acknowledged.
Encouragingly, many are embracing later-life intimacy with positivity. Two fifths say sex is just as enjoyable as when they were younger – if not more so, and over 60 per cent feel just as confident about their sexuality. But too many remain unsure where to turn for advice, or overwhelmed by the modern landscape of dating, consent and online safety.
This is why Age UK’s new guide matters. It cuts through embarrassment and misconception, offering down-to-earth support on everything from pleasure and comfort to communication and safety. Most importantly, it reminds us that intimacy – in all its forms – is not optional or frivolous. It’s connection, it’s confidence and it’s wellbeing.
Older people aren’t asking for permission to have a sex life. They’re asking us to stop pretending they don’t have one. And it is long past time we listened.
____________________
Dr Lis Boulton is Age UK’s Health & Care Policy Manager.
LBC Opinion provides a platform for diverse opinions on current affairs and matters of public interest.
The views expressed are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official LBC position.
To contact us email opinion@lbc.co.uk