Moments after winning Olympic bronze, this athlete blew up his private life - I know what that feels like

And instead of talking about his race or training, Sturla Holm Laegreid said something that made everything else disappear. He admitted to cheating on his girlfriend.

He didn't wait for it to leak or hide behind some PR statement; he just said it, straight up. Some would say that it was cruel to publicise this to the whole world, but I say it was brave.

I know how hard it is to tell the truth.

Years ago, I cheated on my husband, but there were no medals or cameras, just a kitchen table and a sentence that changed both of our lives. My heart was pounding so hard I thought I was going to be sick, and I remember thinking - who the hell am I now?

When you admit to cheating, you're not just risking your relationship. Your entire sense of self gets thrown up in the air. Watching someone you love fall apart because of what you did is life shattering. The guilt and shame hit you so hard, and you don’t know who you are anymore.

But here's what I've learned, both from my own experience and from working with women who've been through the same thing: telling the truth is where life begins. Not the neatly put together life, the one that society tells us we must lead, but the messy, uncomfortable kind.

The truth is betrayal destroys the image you had of yourself - the good one, the successful one, the moral one - and forces you to look at yourself in a whole new way. If I am capable of this, then maybe I don’t know myself?

There is no getting away from the fact that cheating causes serious and long-lasting damage. As does living a lie. And the truth is, humans have the capacity to hurt one another, even when there is love.

So when someone stands up and says, “I did this,” without excuses, it doesn’t make the betrayal smaller, but it does mean taking radical self-responsibility.

There is without doubt serious consequences of our actions. But there is also a moment where you decide whether you are going to hide, blame, minimise…or grow up.

And that decision matters more than any medal ever could.

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Alex Croxford is a Love & Relationship Coach who works with women who have had affairs. Alex cheated on her husband months after their wedding a few years ago

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