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Record levels of non-fatal strangulation cases going to court as abuse survivor describes how ex 'tried to kill her'
9 May 2025, 08:17 | Updated: 9 May 2025, 08:18
Trigger Warning: Domestic abuse, violence, suicide.
A survivor of domestic abuse has told LBC how her ex-partner tried to kill her by strangling her to the point where she fell unconscious.
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A survivor of domestic abuse has told LBC how her ex-partner tried to kill her by strangling her to the point where she fell unconscious.
“He fractured my ribs. I lost nails trying to get him off me. He covered me in bruises, horrific. He left me so scared that I tried to jump out of a bedroom window to escape from him."
Michael Cosgrove, 45, from Wythenshawe in Manchester, had known his partner, Kerry Allan, for a year when he grabbed her by the throat and squeezed it so hard the blood-vessels in her eye burst.
He then left her for dead, jumping out of a bathroom window, and eventually being found hiding in the boot of her car.
Cosgrove is awaiting sentencing for attempted murder having been found guilty at Manchester Minshull Street Crown Court earlier on February 25th. His conviction comes as data released by the Crown Prosecution Service shows 2,000 charges of domestic abuse-related strangulation have reached a first hearing in a three-month period for the first time since standalone legislation was introduced in 2022.
The data shows for the first three quarters of the 2024/25 year, 5,613 non-fatal strangulation cases resulted in a Magistrates Court hearing, with a total of 12,604 since the law came into effect, and within the most recent three-month period, nearly a quarter of all attempted murder charges were linked to domestic abuse.
Speaking to LBC about her experience, Kerry, said: “I'd say the last six months of the relationship, there were numerous red flags that I ignored foolishly.
“I let him use poor mental health as an excuse for bad behaviour, toxic traits, and it escalated over the coming months to aggression, name calling. He would pin me down, scream in my face. I think, two weeks before I was attacked, he had thrown an ironing board in the bedroom, threw his phone at me.
“He told me he was depressed. In fact, he was suicidal. When I went to end the relationship, he said I was the only thing getting him out of bed in the morning, and that put such a huge amount of pressure on me. I felt like I was responsible for his mental health. He used to say that I would antagonize him to behave in such a way that he would be so aggressive and scream. I would push him to act like that. And by that point, I think I believed him most of the time.
“I used to think, was I that infuriating that I would push somebody to behave like that?
“I told nobody. I didn't tell my friends, I didn't tell my family, I didn't tell my work colleagues, and he asked me not to as well. So deep down, he knew what he was doing was wrong, and I knew what was wrong, but I couldn't face telling anybody.
"And I think I just got used to it, and I got used to being shouted at, being screamed at. That sort of became the norm when we were arguing, because by that point, he'd never been physical with me. It was words. He had grabbed me by my shoulders and stuff, but at that point he hadn't been physical, and I allowed that.
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“Looking back now, I feel upset with myself that I missed all of that, missed all of the signs and ignored them, made allowances for how he behaved and how he made me feel. I used to say that I didn't know who I was anymore, and I didn't feel like myself anymore. I didn't want to be at home. I found myself working 24/7 to avoid arguments at home.
“It's really hard because you don't want to believe that somebody who you love and you who think loves you, could actually be so cruel to you. You want to believe that there must be another reason why they're doing this. So, it must be because they're depressed, because surely they won't do that to me, it must be because I've neglected them, because I've been working too much.
"It must be because, you know, I'm infuriating, I've antagonised them, because surely nobody would want to do that to you, because that makes you feel so bad about yourself when your confidence is already in the bin. You don't believe that somebody would do that to you. I think that's what I found really hard to deal with.
“We had been arguing a few days prior to my attack, because I had found out he had been online on dating apps, and I got some messages from some women directly, and again, I never told my family, I never told my friends, because I was so ashamed.
"I was so ashamed he’d done that to me, and I was embarrassed. I couldn't face telling them. I decided to let it go. He told me he felt neglected because I was working too much. He was depressed, and I thought maybe I have neglected him, you know, maybe he's depressed.
“We went out with my mum and my step-dad two days later to watch a New Order gig. And we got home about 11:30pm when we started arguing. He was accusing me of flirting with somebody, and I remember being so angry. I told him it was a joke, after what he had done to me that week, after what he put me through and the things that I found out, and I told him that we were done. I'd had enough, and I was going to my mum's. I didn't want to be with him, and I told him he was disgusting.
“He repeatedly strangled me three times. He strangled me so hard that he burst the blood vessels in my eye. He fractured my ribs. I lost nails trying to get him off me. He covered me in bruises, horrific. He left me so scared that I tried to jump out of a bedroom window to escape from him, and he left me unconscious, completely unconscious, to be found by police and paramedics.”
At Cosgrove’s trial, jury members heard how neighbours heard her screams for help and pleaded for him to stop when ringing the police. Cosgrove also made repeated threats to kill Kerry, and then to kill himself, which the court heard were designed to make her believe that he was serious.
The third time Cosgrove strangled Kerry, she was rendered unconscious. Hearing the bangs and shouts from police officers before their forced entry, Cosgrove fled by jumping out of the bathroom window. He was arrested later that morning after being found in the boot of Kerry’s car.
In court, Cosgrove gave evidence claiming he was acting in self-defence, that Kerry had been drunk, and he had merely caught her by the throat as she fell over.
“There has been no justification”, Kerry added. “There's no accountability. There's not one shred of remorse, not one shred of empathy from him. He admitted nothing, denied every single charge, and put me through an eight-day long trial where he had me put in the witness box twice.
“He claimed his injuries were self-defence, that he tried to stop me from falling and grabbed me by the throat. His defence was like something from a cartoon. For me, that's most hurtful thing, because there is no remorse, and there's no justification, none.
“I feel like, since we got the guilty verdict, I almost feel like I can breathe, would probably be the best way to put it, like I can breathe. I used to wake up in the night constantly because it would weigh on my mind so heavily. I feel like I've got, like, a big weight lifted off my shoulders, and I'm so proud of myself that I was able to see through right to the end, because it is difficult and it's hard to go through a horrific event like that, where somebody has left you with horrific injuries, but then to be put through a trial where you have every bit of your character cut into pieces and assassinated. You know, it's not for the faint-hearted, and it is hard, but it is possible."
In a bid to stop anyone else experiencing the same as her, Kerry said: “Please speak to someone. It could be family, friends, work colleagues. There are online services that you can be directed to. The police, who I have dealt with, have been fantastic. There's so much support out there that anyone who's going through any type of abuse, and it doesn't just have to be physical, it can be emotional, financial, anything like that.
"Please don't ignore or make excuses for red flags, toxic traits and bad behaviour. Somebody's poor mental health doesn't give them an excuse to verbally or physically assault you under any circumstances.”
Josephine Lazzari, from the Crown Prosecution Service, said: “Michael Cosgrove sought to take the life of someone he claimed to love in a brutal and vicious attack. Kerry Allan believed she would die, and that is what he intended to happen.
“The seriousness of strangulation cannot be ignored. In this case it was clear: strangulation was this coward’s method of choice to kill. Every act of strangulation makes the risk of homicide real.
“The conviction of this abuser is testament to the work achieved across the criminal justice system to improve how we bring together medical evidence, witness accounts and prosecution strategies in domestic abuse cases. We know there is more to be done, but we will continue to improve to give justice to more victims of domestic abuse and strangulation.
“I cannot commend Kerry enough for her bravery and her commitment to raise awareness so others have the confidence to report these crimes knowing they will be taken seriously.”
During the trial, medical evidence was shown to the jury showing the injuries Cosgrove inflicted on Kerry.
Expert evidence was also used to explain to the jury the danger associated with strangulation and the effects it can cause. Dr Ewa Wolska, a forensic physician with expertise in strangulation, gave her opinion that the injuries Ms Allan obtained were from a life-threatening event.
Bernie Ryan, Chief Executive Officer at the Institute for Addressing Strangulation, told LBC: “The offence of non-fatal strangulation was categorized on its own because of the recognition of the dangerousness of the offence and the health consequences of strangulation, so depleting the oxygen to the brain and blood supply to the brain can cause health implications, either immediately or long term.
“In Kerry's case, clearly, that was a very violent attack. What we see in non-fatal strangulation is often there are no visible injuries, and the symptoms can be confusing. So, anybody that's going through a traumatic experience like that, will suffer with confusion and a lack of confidence in understanding their symptoms that can be exacerbated by the act of strangulation.
“For frontline professionals to be able to respond appropriately, recognize the dangerous situation that victims are in, hopefully, their immediate safety is addressed and their longer-term health and psychological needs are addressed.”
Cosgrove denied ever threatening, assaulting or attempting to kill his then partner.
Following a trial at Manchester Minshull Street Crown Court, a jury found Cosgrove guilty of attempted murder and strangulation and he will be sentenced on July 14th.
Those feeling distressed or suicidal can call Samaritans for help on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.org in the UK. In the US, call the Samaritans branch in your area or 1 (800) 273-TALK
